Thin People Do Not Have "Special Powers"

I get the feeling from a lot of heavy people that they think thin or healthy-weight persons have "special powers," that somehow they can eat what they want and not gain weight. Sure, I suppose there are a few such individuals, but that's not the norm. Rather, thin people are either disciplined in their eating or they are focused on other interests than food.

One summer I read the many books of Carlos Castenada in which he tells of his experiences with a Mexican shaman named don Juan. Don Juan gives Carlos many lessons, but one that is applicable here is the idea of the assemblage point, the point at which an individual's consciousness is configured in relation to the world. Having a healthy attitude toward food is a matter of shifting one's assemblage point away from an addict's self-destructive focus on food and toward a self-confident, life-affirming, disciplined approach to food in which one eats to live, not lives to eat.

This matter is in the forefront of my mind as I recently had email contact with a former co-worker whom I have not seen for several years. She had been unaware of what is going on with my health, and I gave her a brief run-down, then wrote something that I did with the best intentions, but it seems to have been for naught. She is about 5'6" and at least 300 pounds. I wrote that overweight people seem ungrateful for the great gift of health they've been given; that given all that I know about the ravages of diabetes, I can't see why they don't do everything in their power, including losing weight, in order to prevent its development in their own lives. Then I made a personal appeal and said that it is so important for her to lose weight in order to prevent disease and to be able to enjoy life to the fullest.

She wrote back that she gives thanks every day for her health and that she's been struggling with her weight since she was a baby. It's really sad how steeped in denial this response is, since I have often been with her when we've walked only a few hundred feet and she's been out of breath. Certainly that isn't the sign of a healthy body. And I've never been out with her when she hasn't ordered or bought a dessert.

Five or so years ago, we were both at a baby shower for another co-worker. Everyone had been asked to bring something to share, and we were sitting and standing in the break room, munching. The group had divided into two distinct groups. Around the vegetable trays were the thin gals, who were commenting on how crunchy the carrots and celery were and how juicy the tomotoes. Around the dessert table were the overweight gals, who were orgasming over the cheesecake and encouraging each other to have one more brownie or piece of fudge. This vignette made the thin vs. heavy drama so poignantly clear. The thin girls were really enjoying the vegetables, and the heavy gals didn't want anything but the dessert. Different assemblage points.

The problem of obesity is much more than educating people about healthy food choices. It also involves personal responsibility and honesty with one self. In fact these issues are in many ways far more important to an individual's life journey than losing weight.