Putting a Positive Spin on Rejection

I had a much longer and more involved post about Armen deciding that my tubing et. al was more than he could handle, but my attitude toward his rejection has shifted, so I deleted the original post.

Yes, of course, like anyone, it's not an exhilerating feeling to be rejected, especially by someone who thinks I'm fabulous in every other way besides dialysis tubing and insulin pump. But the way I'm looking at it now is that I had two decent dates. Not flutter-in-my-groin dates, not even flutter-in-my-tummy dates, but still much better than the usual reading-a-good-book or mopping-the-kitchen-floor dates (dates in which my time would have been better spent reading a good book or mopping the kitchen floor). Armen could hold up his end of the conversation, he was interested in my opinions, he certainly was flattering, and he treated me (rather than the usual guy who can't even spring for a cup of coffee). We went to a cute Italian restaurant in Hermosa Beach on the first date and to the Santa Anita horse races on the second--the latter being something I hadn't done for more than 20 years, and it was a bunch of fun. So I am very grateful for two nice dates and, as I always am, even on the dull dates, for meeting another human being, someone who adds to the rich tapestry of life.

And that's the right attitude. The time we shared was pleasant. There will be other men, and there's a high probability of more rejection, but there's also the possibility that I'll have fun on some of the dates and the possibility, albeit slim, that one of those men will say he's willing to explore getting close to me, despite the tubing. I mean, it is possible. I don't know if it's of the probability of being invited for dinner at the White House or of finding a $20 bill on the sidewalk. But it is a possibility. Probably a much stronger possibility is that I'll get on the kidney wait list, a living donor who matches me will offer me his or her kidney, and I'll be rid of the tubing forever. That would be far better than any date!