Three Blind Dates

Last month marked 19 years ago that I left my husband. In those almost-two decades, I have often asked friends, acquaintances, business associates, and students to set me up with someone. In all that time, I have only had three blind dates.

One had just gotten out of rehab. We met at a coffeehouse, but he didn't have money for coffee. Besides, as coffee is a drug, he wasn't going down that path. A second one lived in someone's garage. He had not eaten for a few days, so I made him a tunafish sandwich. The third was on house arrest, though it took a half-hour phone conversation to figure that out. He kept suggesting that I come over to his place for a first date. I kept saying that, that was not my policy--to meet men at their apartments on a first date. At first he said he was on call and could not leave his house. Finally, he admitted that his bracelet would alert authorities if he did. I turned down this third gentleman, so in truth I've only had two blind dates in 19 years.

Why is this? So many people I've met over the years have told me of how their friends or co-workers introduced them to their future boyfriend, girlfriend, lover, or spouse. Don't my friends know any interesting, eligible men? Do they not believe me when I tell them I'd sure appreciate a recommendation?

And perhaps a more interesting question: Why did they send me these men? Do I look like a woman who wants a "project"? Do I present myself as a woman who wants to carry a man? That's sure not the way I see myself.

Or were they just having a good joke at my expense? I mean, in retrospect, there is certainly a laugh or two to be had here, but then perhaps they could have followed up with a viable option.

It's a mystery.