No News

Yesterday was to have been the day that the UCLA panel was to have made its decision regarding Cindy's eligibility. I expected to receive word from Cindy, but I have not heard anything. This week I sent her two emails and a Facebook message and left two voice messages.

When Janet, my next-door neighbor, was my potential donor ,we talked every day during our walks with our dogs. When either of us received info from UCLA, we would tell each other about it that day. And when Janet and I were working on a paired donation with Bob and Maria, I spoke with or emailed Bob many times a week. I have not received emails from Cindy for a month or so and have only spoken with her twice on the phone, the last time a week ago. Both times I have, she has been very enthusiastic about the transplant; she says, "where there's a will, there's a way"; and she gives me every indication that she is 100% on board. She strikes me as a compassionate, hardworking, thoughtful woman who wants to give through her work and through her everyday living.

I understand that she may not have time for a phone conversation, but a short email that said "UCLA gave a go-ahead" or "I spoke with my brother, and I'm going to wait to give my kidney to him when the time comes" would be fine too. If Cindy has reconsidered, I'd like to know so I can pursue some other avenue, and if she is moving forward with UCLA, I'd sure like to know that too. I'd like to be in the loop.

The UCLA coordinator won't talk with me about what's going on because her ethical and legal directive is to protect the rights of the donor. And the coordinator won't tell Janet anything about Cindy's status because that is a privacy issue. The system is designed to protect the donor, as it should be. Any information I get has to come from Cindy.

I'm sure she's busy as she works full-time, is studying to be an RN, and is in a relationship, any one of which is time-consuming. I'll wait a day or so and then try to contact her again. And in the meantime, I just have to let the whole thing slip out of my mind. What is going to happen is going to happen, with or without me thinking about it.