A More Encompassing View of Motherhood

On this Mother's Day, my hope is that all women and their individual decisions regarding children will be honored and respected. Mothering and motherhood manifest in so many ways that go well beyond the narrow view of giving physical birth.

The woman who lovingly cares for animals or for her garden, the one who brings in homemade baked goods for her coworkers, the gal who remembers her friends' birthdays with cards and calls, the woman who has a deep connection with nature or who works for peace and justice or is a counselor, a therapist, a doctor, a nurse, an acupuncturist, a teacher, or a massage therapist--all these women manifest the loving, nurturing qualities of a good mother.

I'm sure that today many women who do not have children are feeling down. As I have often felt on Valentine's Day, they feel that everyone else but them has been invited to a huge party. Just as the unloved (at least in a romantic sense) are uninvited to the Valentine's Day party, childless women are left out of the Mother's Day celebrations, especially after their own mothers have died. Up until that time, the focus is on the women who gave birth to them, but once they're gone, the focus then shifts to themselves.

Of course, some women are happy with their decision not to have children, but others may have wanted children but never found the right person with whom to have them or were physically unable to conceive. To these women and to society as a whole, I say, Expand your notion of motherhood.

The world could certainly do with more nurturing, caring, loving, attending, healing, helping, guiding, and nourishing. And not simply from biological mothers but from everyone, female and male, of child-bearing years or not. Just think how dramatically life on this planet would change if we all went out into the world beaming love at the world as a mother beams love at her child. And if we cared about each person we met with the concern and consideration that a mother gives to her child.

If each one of us acted as good mothers every day, I can't see how we would ever tolerate the destruction of the rainforests or the drumbeat to war or the imprisonment of the innocent or the torture of the never-brought-to-trial. Also, like a mother, we would insist on punishment and correction if the world strayed. If we looked at banksters, for example, as a mother would look at a child who has committed serious wrongs, we would not allow them to continue their evil work. We would insist that they take a time-out or we'd take away all their toys and privileges. Wouldn't that be fantastic--a time-out from unchecked greed and the ungodly wealthy deprived of their toys and privileges! Now that's the kind of mothering banksters need!